Death is a normal occurrence which will hit each one of us
at its’ predestined time. Allah says in the Qur’an (interpretation of its
meaning)
“Every soul will taste death” [3: 185].
So let us make use of our life before our death as advised
by the prophet (peace and blessing be upon him who said “Make the most of five
things before five others: life before death, health before sickness, free time
before becoming busy, youth before old age, and wealth before poverty.” (
Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 1077). But how should a Muslim react to the death of a
loved one and what are the proper steps to take during the morning and burial
period?
A Muslim reaction to death
Whilst the death of a person happens at its predestined
time, it is a test for those related to the deceased. Hence as Muslims, we
react to death the same way we react to trials. We react by being patient and
saying " Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Raaji'oon".
Allah says in the
Quran (meaning of its interpretation),
And We will surely
test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and
fruits, but give good tidings to the patient, {2:155}
Who, when disaster strikes them, say, "Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we will return." {2:156}
Those are the ones upon whom are blessings from their Lord and mercy. And it is those who are the [rightly] guided. {2:157}
Who, when disaster strikes them, say, "Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we will return." {2:156}
Those are the ones upon whom are blessings from their Lord and mercy. And it is those who are the [rightly] guided. {2:157}
Since the death of a loved one is a test, it is important for
us to use the opportunity to remember death, repent, and draw closer to Allah.
Usually when a person loses a loved one, it reminds one of the realities of
death. What have you and I prepared for when we are shrouded and placed beneath
the earth?
Mourning and condolence
The mourning of a deceased should not be more than three
days except the case of a widow. It was narrated that, Umm Habeebah bint Abi Sufyaan
reported that when the news of her father’s death reached her, she called for
some perfume and wiped it on her forearms, and said: “I do not need it, but I
heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: ‘It is not
permitted for a woman who believes in Allaah and the Last Day to mourn for any
dead person for more than three days, except for a husband, (in which case the
period of mourning is) four months and ten days. (Reported by al-Bukhaari,
4926).
It is also important to note that it is not the Sunnah of
the prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) to wear black while mourning, raise
one’s voice in wailing and lamenting, striking the cheeks and eulogizing the
deceased. These are all bid’ah and actions of the jaahiliyyah.
The Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) disavowed the one who does that when he
said: “He is not one of us who rends his garment and slaps his cheeks and calls
out with the call of jaahiliyyah.”
Sheikh Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him)
mentioned in Majmoo’ Fataawa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, (17/414): Wearing black in
mourning for the dead is a kind of bid’ah and displaying grief, and it is akin
to rending one’s garment and slapping one’s cheeks. He also mentioned in Majmoo’
Fataawa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, 17/329, that wearing black clothes at times of calamity
is an innovation with no Sunnah basis.
Should the family of the deceased gather to receive condolence ie (stay in a particular place where people who wish to offer condolence can meet them)?
This is a matter in which the scholars differed: The view of the Shaafa‘is and Hanbalis is that
it was markooh to gather in order to receive condolence, and many of the
Maalikis; some of them even stated that it is haraam. The strongest evidence
was the report of Jareer ibn ‘Abdullah who sated: We used to regard gathering with
the family of the deceased as wailing (which is forbidden). Narrated by Ahmad,
6866; and Ibn Maajah, 1612.
They also stated that
gathering to receive condolence is something that was not done by the Prophet
(blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) or any of his Companions, hence it
is something that has been introduced. It is also contrary to the practice of
the righteous early generations, who did not gather to receive condolences.
However, the of some of the Hanafis, some of the Maalikis
and some of the Hanbalis, were of the opinion that there was nothing wrong with
gathering to receive condolence as long as the it was free of objectable actions
and innovation. One of the strongest evidence quoted was the hadeeth of
‘Aa’ishah, the wife of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him)
according to which, that if a member of her family died, the women would gather
together, then they would depart, except her own relatives and close friends.
She would order that a pot of talbeenah be cooked, then some thareed would be
made and the talbeenah would be poured over it. Then she would say: Eat some of
it, for I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) say: “Talbeenah soothes the heart of the sick person, and it takes away
some of the grief.”
They also viewed gathering to offer condolences comes under
the heading of traditions or customs, and not acts of worship, and the issue of
innovation is not applicable with regard to traditions or customs; rather the
basic principle with regard to traditions or customs is that they are
permissible. https://islamqa.info/en/215016
Cooking from the
household of the deceased.
We see these days that when a person dies, immediate families
of the deceased cook for those who come to offer condolence. The correct thing
is for relatives and neighbours to prepare meals for the immediate family of
the deceased. It was narrated that when
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) heard that his
cousin Ja’far ibn Abi Taalib (may Allaah be pleased with him) had died in the
Battle of Mu’tah, he told his family to make food for the family of Ja’far, and
said, “Because there has come to them that which will preoccupy them.”
It is also important to note that it is not permissible the family to cook for people for the sake of the deceased
whether it is done on the day of the death, or on the fourth or tenth day after
the death, or at the new year. So the slaughtering a ram or cow for the sake of
the deceased the deceased is NOT permitted during funeral or “mourning ceremony”.
This is because it was narrated that Jareer ibn ‘Abd-Allaah al-Bajali (may
Allaah be pleased with him) – one of the companions of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) – said, “We used to count gathering with the
family of the deceased and making food for them after the burial to be a kind
of wailing (niyaahah).”
There have also been many cases where a person dies and the
family is disheartened, not just because of the death of their loved one but
also because of the cost that comes with mourning and burial. The religion of
Allah is easy, rather it is the people that make it difficult. All innovations/
bid’ah introduced into the religion are bad and are not accepted by Allah as
the prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) stated repeatedly that:
"Every newly-invented thing is a bid'ah (innovation), every bid'ah is a
going astray, and every going astray will be in the Fire." (Reported by
al-Nisaa'i in al-Sunan, Salaat al-'Eedayn, Baab kayfa al-Khutbah). Reports with
the same meaning were narrated via Jaabir (may Allaah be pleased with him) by
Ahmad, via al-'Irbaad ibn Saariyah by Abu Dawud and via Ibn Mas'ood (may Allaah
be pleased with him) by Ibn Maajah..
Key things to remember.
- · There is no need to give money to the family of the deceased
- · Forty days’ celebration that people do is bid’ah. In sha Allah I will explain more about this in my next post.
- · There is no such thing as a person dying before their time or a dead person avenging their death.
- · There is no such thing as ‘spirts of the dead’. After a person has been buried, they are either getting rewarded or punished in their graves.
In sha Allah I will be posting
next on funerals, and some innovations regarding it as well how the living can
benefit the dead.
Sources
https://islamqa.info/en/864
https://islamqa.info/en/1333
https://islamqa.info/en/13307
https://islamqa.info/en/215016
https://islamqa.info/en/864
https://islamqa.info/en/1333
https://islamqa.info/en/13307
https://islamqa.info/en/215016
Original author : Contact17
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